Identity as a Sorority Woman: Letters don't label me

Getting caught up in all the glitter, and rhinestones, and pageantry of sorority life was something I never thought would happen to me. The rich heritage of Greek life was never founded on superficialities.

Character, academics, and volunteerism were the staples which I was raised on. It made logical sense to me, after talking to many Greek alumni about how their sorority or fraternity had brought out all those good aspects of them, to go Greek. Knowing that my friendships were based on centuries of other women’s friendships was such an awe-inspiring idea.

So just a few weeks before my freshman year, I went through formal Sorority Recruitment and came out on the other side as a new member. The sorority I got a bid from was a group of the type of women that I had looked up to- they were pretty, involved, and as far as I could tell, genuinely cared for one another. I was excited to work side-by-side with them in both work and play.

Yet, soon after I became a new member, I became entranced by anything that could be emblazoned by Greek letters. Slowly but surely, I became more focused on how I packaged myself as a sorority girl than on the great values my sisterhood was founded upon. Without a word said directly to me, I began thinking that I was not a “real sorority girl” if I did not wear Nike shorts and oversized t-shirts.

Since college is rumored to be the time when people develop who they are as a person, I thought this was just the road I was supposed to take. I should look like everyone and be like everyone else because they just look so happy.

What I came to find out, is that they were becoming themselves. When I tried to copy everyone else’s style, I lost track of who I really am as an individual. Somehow, I still thought I was a great representation of my sorority. I mean, I dressed the part, I would tell everyone about how much I loved my sisters. I even volunteered for lots of things! What is wrong with that? Nothing, I thought.

Until one day I woke up. I realized that I had founded my entire identity into trying to become the perfect sorority woman. The perfect sorority woman is not someone who runs around constantly blabbering on and on and on about how much they love their Greek Life. The perfect sorority woman is not someone who always wears Lilly Pulitzer or Polo. The perfect sorority woman is not someone who is based on trivial things.

That is because those things are not what makes a sorority woman. Those aspects are neither bad nor good, unless someone makes them their idol like I did. The things that define us are our character, our absolute and honest love for each other, and how we treat people. When I embraced the fact that my values, not my outfit was what made me a sorority girl, my experience was so much more enriching. Then, my eyes were opened to seeing more than a girl walking down the street in another sorority’s letter, but a woman who had values and principles that have been shared for centuries.